Beyond Deep Darkness and Fear
Genesis 15:1-13, 17-18
Abram, also known as Abraham, is a biblical figure we think we know well. However, upon deeper reflection, we realize we actually know very little about him. The simple designation "father of faith" serves as our primary introduction to Abram, and we have accepted this characterization without question.
The story of God calling Abram from his homeland in Ur of the Chaldeans and leading him to Canaan might seem disconnected from our lives. While it is fascinating that Ur was an advanced civilization, we rarely question why God specifically chose "Abram" from that place. It is remarkable that this seemingly ordinary person from an unrelated land is recognized as the forefather of faith in both Judaism and Christianity.
The region of Ur was excavated in 1930 by British archaeologists. The discovery of two-story houses from that period provides insight into the sophistication and grandeur of Mesopotamian civilization. Yet despite these significant archaeological findings, the question remains: why Abram? In modern terms, choosing Abram from Ur would be comparable to selecting "Michael" from San Francisco today.
This consideration led me to wonder whether "Abram" represents not just an individual but a symbolic figure—"a person called by God, overcoming fear and uncertainty, faithfully walking the path God has prepared."
In verse 1, we encounter the classic language of divine calling: "Do not be afraid, Abram. I am your shield, your very great reward." God begins His calling with the reassurance "Do not be afraid." A divine calling is invariably preceded by fear.
I had approximately 80 classmates in seminary, but fewer than 40 of them are currently serving in ministry. What happened to the others? From my recollection, about 20 left school before graduating, and another 20 pursued careers outside of ministry. I still vividly remember our first class and initial meeting as students. The predominant emotion I experienced then was unmistakably "fear."
Fear accompanies every new journey we undertake. When I first entered the United States during my initial immigration check, when I attended my first class and met my professor, when I first ordered food in English for my children—all these moments evoked similar feelings of apprehension and anxiety.
I remember taking my children to McDonald's shortly after arriving in the U.S. My family was depending on me, confident that I could successfully order French fries for the children. When it was finally my turn and the employee made eye contact, I confidently said, "Potato." The employee didn't understand. Though it was just a brief moment, I could sense my children's disappointment. Suddenly, the employee's face brightened with recognition: "Oh, French fries!" We all smiled with relief, and the children cheered with excitement. Even now, remembering that moment of cold sweat and helplessness constricts my heart.
Many of you have likely experienced similar situations (don't pretend otherwise!). Some may have broken into a nervous sweat when first hearing "Here or to go?" at a restaurant, not knowing how to respond.
Our lives are continually confronted with fear. This is why God's reassurance to Abram—"Do not be afraid, I am your shield"—is so profoundly comforting. This statement reveals that although we might expect a divine calling to be primarily characterized by joy and excitement, it is often fear that comes first.
Looking at the context preceding our passage, we can infer that Abram was already living a relatively successful life in Canaan. In Genesis 14, five northern kings attacked Sodom and Gomorrah, capturing Lot and seizing his possessions. In response, Abram mobilized 318 trained men from his household and rescued Lot.
The fact that Abram could deploy his own trained militia suggests he had established himself as a significant military leader in the region. Yet despite this apparent power and influence, today's passage reveals that Abram still experienced fear when confronted with God's calling.
Abram's response to God's reassuring voice is particularly revealing.
In verse 2, Abram says, "Sovereign Lord, what can you give me since I remain childless, and the one who will inherit my estate is Eliezer of Damascus?" Despite God's promise of protection, Abram immediately expresses his greatest concern—his lack of children. In the ancient Near East, children symbolized prosperity and continuity. Although Abram had journeyed from Ur to Canaan at God's command and achieved apparent success, his deepest anxiety remained his childlessness. His response might seem disconnected from God's promise of protection, but it reveals that this issue overshadowed everything else in his life.
Standing before God's calling, Abram confesses his greatest fear: having no heir.
In verse 3, Abram continues his lament: "You have given me no children; so a servant in my household will be my heir." Essentially, he is saying, "What good is your shield if my most profound concern remains unresolved?"
In life, we often grapple with one overwhelming issue that seems to consume everything else. We believe that if only this one problem were solved, our lives would finally find balance and fulfillment. God's call to Abram prompted him to articulate his deepest insecurity. Perhaps we, too, tend to focus more on what we lack rather than appreciating what we have been given.
In verse 4, God addresses Abram's concern directly: "This man will not be your heir, but a son coming from your own body will be your heir." Then God takes Abram outside and shows him the stars, saying, "Look up at the heavens and count the stars—if indeed you can count them. So shall your offspring be." This brief exchange between God and Abram reveals one of the most compelling aspects of faith: we bring our deepest concerns to God, and God promises to address them. This is why many expect that faith will always lead to tangible blessings in their lives. However, what we must not overlook is that Abram first had to confront his fears and stand before God.
Why did God respond to Abram's concern with such assurance? What made Abram special? Was it merely his journey from Ur to Canaan? The key to Abram's unique relationship with God lies in how, despite his fears, he continued to rely on God throughout his journey.
The text continues: "Abram believed the Lord, and He credited it to him as righteousness." Here we discover why God honored Abram's plea. God considered Abram's faith righteous not because Abram himself was righteous, but because Abram's faith demonstrated God's righteousness.
Living a life of faith is not about proving our own righteousness. Rather, it is about revealing, through our faith, that God is righteous.
As the passage continues, God affirms that He brought Abram from Ur to give him possession of the land of Canaan. Abram then asks for confirmation of this promise.
In verses 9-10, God instructs Abram on how to prepare for this covenant ceremony:
"Bring me a heifer, a goat and a ram, each three years old, along with a dove and a young pigeon." Abram follows these instructions, cutting the animals in half and arranging the pieces opposite each other, though he does not divide the birds.
This scene depicts an ancient Near Eastern covenant-making ritual where parties would walk between the divided animals as a sign of their commitment. God employs this familiar method to establish His covenant with Abram. This practice later evolved into the sacrificial system that became central to Israelite worship, with offerings serving as a way of affirming one's covenant relationship with God.
Everything appears to be proceeding smoothly, but verse 12 reveals a profound emotional experience for Abram: "As the sun was setting, Abram fell into a deep sleep, and a thick and dreadful darkness came over him." The Korean Revised Version translates this as "great darkness and fear."
This "thick and dreadful darkness" parallels the description found in the Gospels during Jesus' crucifixion. Though Abram is in the midst of establishing a covenant with God, and all seems well, he is suddenly overwhelmed by intense darkness and fear. During this vision, Abram learns that his descendants will face oppression and enslavement for four hundred years.
The most significant verse in today's passage is verse 12, which describes Abram's experience of deep darkness and fear. Life rarely follows a smooth, predictable path. If we believe that faith guarantees protection from hardship, we fundamentally misunderstand its nature.
Life begins with fear and continues with recurring experiences of deep darkness and fear. Even Jesus did not avoid suffering but embraced it, choosing the path of the cross for our salvation. This teaches us that suffering is not something to escape but something to confront and overcome with faith.
After this moment of terror, verses 17-18 show that God successfully establishes His covenant with Abram. We often expect that faith in God will remove all obstacles and make our lives trouble-free. We desire divine invincibility, believing that with God as our shield, nothing can harm us. When God tells Abram, "I am your shield," it sounds like a guarantee of complete protection. However, God's shield does not eliminate fear and darkness—it enables us to walk through them with faith.
As we journey through Lent, we reflect on Christ's suffering to better understand and embrace the deep darkness and fear we encounter in our own lives.
Abram is recognized as a person whose faith revealed God's righteousness. Though he may seem distant and unrelated to us, and we may not directly feel his impact on our lives, we are called to follow a similar path. Like Abram, we are summoned by God to venture into the unknown, experiencing moments of overwhelming fear and seemingly impenetrable darkness. Yet through these experiences, we continue to trust in God's plan and affirm His covenant with us.
There is a well-known pastor, Joel Osteen, who preaches prosperity theology. In his sermons, he suggests that earnest prayer guarantees that God will fulfill all our desires. He frequently shares stories of miraculous provision—people deciding they want to purchase a house, for example, and immediately receiving the means to do so.
Personally, I believe that if Christianity focuses primarily on prosperity and material success, we will fail to grasp the profound significance of Christ's suffering and the cross.
Recently, a Netflix series titled "Chicken Nugget" (originally "폭삭 속았수다" in Korean) has gained worldwide popularity. The phrase "폭삭 속았수다" might sound like "I was thoroughly deceived," but in Jeju dialect, it actually means "You have worked extremely hard." The show's popularity stems partly from excellent acting, but primarily because it authentically portrays the struggles of everyday life. Although we hope for smooth, trouble-free lives, we consistently encounter challenges and hardships.
Today's passage reveals that even though Abram appeared outwardly successful, he still harbored deep fears and insecurities. Just when everything seemed to be falling into place, he encountered "deep darkness and fear." As I mentioned earlier, this phrase parallels the description of Jesus on the cross. Christianity is not about avoiding suffering but about overcoming deep darkness and fear to embrace new life in Christ.
As we continue our journey, we will face various challenges in life and moments of hardship in our faith. However, through it all, we must walk alongside God, expressing gratitude and joy even amidst suffering.
Dear Open Church congregation, I am committed to walking this path with you as we build a stronger church community. Last Monday, I attended the annual conference and announced our plan to begin an English worship service in July. Though this new initiative will present challenges, I ask for your interest and support as we work to establish ourselves more firmly in the Orinda community. Together, we will serve as salt and light in this land, embracing the deep darkness and fear we may encounter, and walking faithfully into the new life God is preparing for us.
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